First blog. My experiences

My name is Jamie, this is something I have been thinking of doing for a while I just didn't know where to start LOL!

In 2012 I had read in a magazine "chat magazine" about women who were writing inmates in the U.S. After reading the stories of other women writing inmates I decided to search on Google for "inmate pen-pals" during my search I came across a website called www.writeaprisoner.com, at first I was very hesitant and had talked to my husband about it, i asked whether or not he was alright with my writing to inmates and to my surprise he said OK!

  I started writing to inmates but out of the ones i wrote to only one replied, for this blog I will call my new found friend "Jack", he has been inside since the age of 16, I was very nervous when I started writing to him but at the same time I was overwhelmed by the questions he asked me. he asked me questions no one had ever asked me before! eventually I started asking him the same sort of questions, a lot of his Questions had to do with things like love, life moments and experiences I have gone through.

   I was shocked by his loyalty to me as a new found friend when his mom had emailed me to tell me that Jack was in the "hole" and had wanted me to write to him during his time in there, two months of talking quickly turned into a year of lessons and laughter and a strong friendship, he's actually my best friend (besides my husband of course).

I thought that if I could write to an inmate and be someone that is there for them, the one to put a smile on their face and keep their spirits high then it was worth my time, the way i see it is they have already been judged and its not my place to do that, everyone deserves a second chance! anyway it turned out to be the other way around, Jack has more or less been there for me and kept my spirits high when I have talked to him about things in my life, he's given me good advice on how to see things and as I've always said to him "you're so much wiser than me, yet we're the same age, you're so much smarter than me" He's told me things about how the correctional system works in the US and how you have to just be ready for anything because of the the things that go on.

At first it was a bit daunting with the things he has told me, I felt sad for him and when i told him he simply replied "don't feel that for me, feel happy for me" but how can i feel happy for a very special friend of mine when hes got so many more years to go? then i realized that he meant "be happy that we know each other that you're making me smile"  I thought I could help him to be a better person, then I realized he's done that by himself.

  

Jack is the most humble person I've ever known and he's true to himself.  Sometimes though I find it a struggle when he has "be on my own days" where he just takes time off from talking to people, keeping to himself, all I can think when he does that is, is he OK? Hahahaha, but why worry when he's been doing that for the last 10 years?

  You can learn a lot from talking to someone "behind bars" but you can also learn a lot about yourself, from talking and writing to him I've learned to be more open, I've learned I can open my heart to others, I've learned that when you're down you will always have a friend there for you, although the email system takes its time sending the emails. two hours there and two hours back to me a total of 4 hours.  In all honesty it was both my husband and Jacks encouragement that got me starting a blog as both have told me that I have the talent and writing is my gift, that I have the potential to become something.

  

I know as my first blog this is a bit jumpy here and there, as I really don't know how to do it LOL.
Before I go I will say and encourage others to write inmates as we all have so much more to give! as I've told my husband "the world is too small and life is to short to be judgmental" and yet at times I feel judged for writing inmates because of what others think, but I have learned to ignore that feeling because this is something I want to do, something I will continue to do.

I've learned a lot from talking to Jack and I know that we will be friends for life, as for the other inmates...A few stopped writing hahaha, I don't know if it was my super long letters that put them off or not, But i just carry on and write to more, I wouldn't mind having a female inmate to write to but i think that they are more stubborn than men, maybe they are just looking for a man for when they are done doing their time.

The more and more I write the more I want to be a friend to whoever writes back, I believe inmates have more experiences than what we have, it may not be life experiences like relationships, having a family or a new job, but they more or less share experiences of the tougher side of life, the true experience of paying for a big mistake they have made, they will see things we will never see and can share how they had dealt with their experiences, writing to inmates isn't such a bad thing, even Jack has encouraged me to write to as many as I can and honestly it's really nice to know that I can be there for someone as well, it's really nice to have loads of letters (if it happens) being posted through your door!

I will write something once a week to share my thoughts and feelings of how everything is going :P

Thanks for reading.